All Entries in the "Politics" Category
Petitioning for more Petitions
Columbia, MO—Among the recent onslaught of annoying petitioners in downtown Columbia, a new petition has begun circulation to increase the amount of petitions. Zebediah Kennard, local artist and self-proclaimed downtowner, remarked, “I’m really glad this new one came along, for a while there it seemed like all the petitions were about to dry up!” Recently [...]
Tea Party attracts a wide variety of people
Jefferson City, MO- A tea party formed on the steps of the Missouri State Capital yesterday leaving many demographics very disappointed. While the scene was a rally for tax reform, poor marketing attracted many of the wrong crowd. Residents of local assisted living facilities demanded to be taken to the event expecting a far different [...]
Legislators turn to Citizens for Help
Jefferson City, MO – Three weeks ago the Missouri state senate met to discuss the possibility of a new radical government: efficient and affordable. Tuesday morning, with no ideas for implementation, they met again to review more than 1,000 emails from Missouri citizens concerned with state policies hoping to find the answer. Government employed statistician Mick [...]
Elderly vote on mystery meat today
Columbia, MO—The residents of Boone County will take to the polls today. The jobless and elderly will likely constitute the majority of those voting as most citizens in this area don’t bother themselves with such trivial issues. Voters in Columbia will get Obama-like change whether they want it or not. Starting with the mayor, religious leaders [...]
